After being on social media for a while, now, I have come to a disturbing conclusion. People seem to be Stuck On Cute!
Photo after photo of kittens, puppies and babies are everywhere. Rather than voice an opinion or take a stance on something relevant people choosing to hide behind these “Cute” photos and sappy “Memes” that are usually something like, “I’m for goodness and nice people. How about you?” Everyone seems to be bent on this “I want to be seen as a Nice Person” kick!
Advertisers pump this image of themselves as having motives of the betterment of mankind and the earth or the environment for selling their product. If you buy our brand of car it will be good for the environment, because our car runs on lithium batteries! What they leave out is the part about Lithium being poisonous to both pour bodies and our soil! And, by the way, “It’s all natural!” Well, rocks are all natural, rat parts are all natural and yes, toenails are all natural! And we fall for it because, you see, stupid is all natural too!
And we don’t seem to care if our political candidates are competent as long as they are good looking! Do you realize that not since Dwight D. Eisenhower have we had a President that didn’t have a full head of hair. We seem to believe that a full head of hair can run the most powerful country in the world much better than a person that has some experience running a business or even having a lemonade stand, for that matter. And the USA is the only country in the world that believes this.
However, we make an exception for female candidates. We prefer our female candidates to homely, the homelier the better. And we want them to have butts that are near the size of Cleveland! Because women with butts nearly the size of Cleveland won’t intimidate the female voters who’s butts are actually the size of Cleveland and its suburbs. Women with big butts know who to run big countries!
In the upcoming election, I plan to vote for a candidate that is tall, has a full head of hair and a big butt. Lets see. Marlon Brando is dead, so I can’t vote for her. Let me think, hmm… Wait, I have it! I’m going to vote for Jhon Goodman! At least he’ll be able to act like a President!
I am Kip Addotta
See you at the polls!