Ming, The Living God King

10/20/2014 — 1 Comment

Ming, The Living God King

Although, i am a Roman Catholic and follow the spiritual leadership of Pope Frances, My life coach is Ming, The Living God King!

Ming, The Living God King is from the planet Zoldar, in the Zeta Reticuli Star Group and is on Earth to save Earth from Itself!

Born September 12, 1981

Location 90210

Affiliation The Living God King Teachings

Awards

The Humanitarian Award Given Anonymously! 1982

Best Performance In The Miniature Golf Course Finals! 1984

First Place At The Rugby Boy Watching! Super Dome! 1985

Finest Earwax Collection On Earth 1987

First Prize, National, US, Fart Dodging, Mixed Competition! 1990

Second Place, Free Style Badger Toss, Montreal! 1993

Winner, First National ATM Challenge! 1996, Time, 14 sec!

Skeet Shooting Competition, Singles Only! 1997

Nobel Peace Prize! 2000 Award Accepted By Mohammed Ali!

World Heavy Weight Boxing Championship! 2003 Held For Seven Full Hours!
Gender Plural (neutral)

Personal Information

When in the presence of Ming, The Living God King, you will conduct yourself with respect and homage to Ming, The Living God King!

Personal Interests

Teaching, Listening, Moderating, Helping Earthlings, Ruling, Rugby and Kettle Bells!

Biography

Even before Ming’s birth, the Living God King from the planet Zoldar, in the Zeta Reticuli Star Group, was triggering miracles.

Official biographers say Ming’s birth in an electrical storm on the slopes of The Honqoqeenq Mountains, in September 1981 was foretold by a Zoldarian Raptor and was heralded by a double rainbow.

When Ming was born, a new star appeared in the night Heavens.

Landing on Planet Earth, the first time Ming picked up a golf club, in 1982, Ming shot shot a 45-under par round on Pales Verdes Golf Course, including 14 Holes-In-Ones. Ming then decided to retire from the sport for ever! But, Ming can still be found licking the dew off the 7th green at dawn! Ming, The Living God King stated that the dew reminds one of the taste of a Zoldarian virgin’s genital Gland!

Ming has the ability to alter the weather simply through the power of thought.

The fledgling leader was a genius as an infant, with official Zoldar biographers stating that Ming had learned to walk at just 3 days old and was speaking in 146 languages including Zoldarian in 7 days.

As a school pupil in QyonQyanq, he corrected and chastised the teachers for their incorrect interpretations of history.

Ming, The Living God King wrote six full operas in three days, All of which are better than any other in the history of music!

Ming, The Living God King designed the Tower of the Juqhe Iqea, a 786-meter Phallic Symbol on the East bank of the River Qaeqonq in central Qyonqyanq that is topped by a glowing Green Fist.

Ming, The Living God King’s official biography also notes that Ming wrote 1,500 books during the time at QunQ Universiqy, from where It graduated Magna Cum Likely Lately in 1979.

According to the Zoldarian Central News Aqency, ZCNA. Ming, The Living God King is an expert on all aspects of the film industry and improved the scripts and guided the production of the movie Diary of a Girl Student. Ming’s favorite movies are reportedly, Friday The 13th, Rambo and anything starring Miley Cyrus.

Ming, The Living God King employs six hundred servants to inspect every grain of rice that is served to It, eliminating any with the most minor of flaws!

And me?

I am Kip Addotta

One response to Ming, The Living God King

  1. Dinny Chisholm 10/20/2014 at 18:25

    All hail . . .

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